Troy's Thanksgiving Turkey Benches

I've covered a lot of other countries on Benchsite so this time I thought we'd talk Turkey.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/docksidepress/2982841359

I don't mean that kind of turkey. 

I mean this kind: the one on the Bosphorus, where Europe meets Asia.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/lorix/7962364616

I'm thinking mosques . . . 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/8714491@N05/14405449628

and carpets . . .

www.etsy.com/shop/JayBazaar

and grand bazaars.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/8712554@N02/873341385

Trouble is, I invited Troy to help me with this post and he got here first.

Hi, Troy. I see you're wearing your pilgrim gear. 

Yes, Ma'm. It'll soon be Thanksgiving in the good old US of A. We're plumping up the turkeys . . . 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/8113246@N02/8203258965

. . . and sharpening the shears. 

Do you normally use shears to carve a turkey?

No, Ma'm. Where I come from we use a sabre.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/pasukaru76/5631501667

That's just weird. And anyway, I don't eat turkey. 

To me, Thanksgiving is all about pumpkin pie benches.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/78208664@N00/253065157

Or as they'd say in Turkey, kabak pasta banklar.

But before we go any further, I'd like to clarify a misunderstanding about Turkey. 

Yes, I agree. The little fellow in the picture above is not a turkey; it's a dog dressed as a turkey.

Thanks, but that isn't what I mean.

No, thank you! I'm honoured to be here, Ma'm. I come from Dry Heaves, Minnesota, which is a modest little place and I am grateful every day for the opportunities I've had.

Thanks, Troy, but . . . 

Thanksgiving is all about gratitude and I've got a heart full of gratitude.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/aga_mum/4706711759

I'm sure you have but . . . 

I'd like to thank a few people. First, I'd like to thank my mom for having me.

http://www.rakuten.co.jp/

And thanks, Mom, for teaching me to please say please. And thank you.

My mom is of German ancestry. All through my life she's been a brick.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/frnetz/14517152083/

That's all very well, Troy, but . . . 

My Mexican friends Drida and Friego have also been brilliant. 

Thanks, guys. Or as we'd say in DF . . . 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/ellohir/2074602394 

I'd also like to thank the good ladies of Ballyfrumpy in County Offhand in Ireland. They crocheted this excellent sweater for me.

And this sweater as well. And the hat to go with it. And the gloves. And the scarf.

I am truly blessed.

www.etsy.com/shop/PattisFunnyFarm

And a special thank you to Lady Jess.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/8458761@N08/5292809230

Ever since I've been on Paradise Island she has made me feel at home.

We really enjoyed Lying Together.

Yes, well, the less said about that the better I think. 

Lady Jess and I met through Young Male Readers dot com. Her husband Lord Brassica sent me this bench with a very special message, though I'm not entirely sure what it means. 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/52807531@N00/4183863804

Troy, if you've finished thanking people . . . 

And I'd also like to say thank you to people who put up benches in parks saying thank you. Because parks bring me great joy.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/encee/5015846088

I am going to stop you right there, Troy. I want to show some benches in Turkey and you are gobbling up this whole blog. I want to talk turkey.

I thought we were talking turkey. As in Indian Bird. As in Peruvian Bird or French Bird. Or even Dutch chicken. 


No, I mean the other Turkey. As in Constantinople, the Queen of Cities, where east meets west. 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/ryanaward/6124826130

That's a very poetic turn of phrase you've got there, Ma'm, if you don't mind me saying.

Thank you, Troy. I'd forgotten you're a poet. Istanbul is full of poetry benches, like this one at Heybeliada on the Sea of Marmara.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/williamaveryhudson/2823734944

In fact, there is a whole park of open books.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/kakadu/14524464399

I'd like to sit in the sun on one of those benches and read some poetry. 

That's what this cat is doing. 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/jeremybrooks/15361037117

And then you can visit the Blue Mosque, which isn't quite this blue.

Ma'm, Istanbul is awesome.

Yes. The words Turkish and Delight come to mind.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/colinwarren/11865470526

Couldn't you just sink into a pretty bench like this and sip your Turkish coffee?

www.etsy.com/shop/JayBazaar

No, it's too strong for me. I normally have an Americano.

Boooooorrrrrrrring! 

Anyway, in Istanbul there are plenty of places to sit.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/soledadbrother/6316314435

Throughout Turkey they have banklar çok - lots of benches.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/jacqueline_poggi/12907820884

We have quite a few turkey benches here in the US of A as well.

www.etsy.com/shop/outbackinthebarn

And I'd love to have a seat but now I need to get rolling.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/roadsidepictures/8206417339

You're off to Dry Heaves then.

Yes, and I'm already thinking about Thanksgiving. 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/leff/8208546895

Me too. I've got a pumpkin ready to make my pies.

Wineglass, moustache, manbag . . . I think you've made a mistake here, Ma'm. I met this fellow in Potirons in France. He's a famous chef. 

Oui. Il s'appelle Jench de Bench.

I'd like to say thanks to him.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/dreamsjung/12241111044

Of course I couldn't make a pie out of Jench. Not after all the help he gave me on the Edible Benches blog. 

I guess I never got round to thanking him.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/24613099@N05/3103515782

I hope you'll enjoy your Thanksgiving dinner, Troy. Who will you be sharing your turkey with?

Oh, it's always the same people round the table.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/clotho98/6389456203

Hospitality to strangers is The American Way.

That's not what I'm hearing.

And  it's too late now to show all the lovely Turkish benches I gathered. The benches from Turkey are going to have to wait for another time. 

Sorry, Seashell. I got the wrong end of the drumstick here. 

I went in like a whirling dervish and messed up your Turkish blog.

Well, all I can say to your readers is Sabrınız için teşekkür ederiz - thank you for your patience.

That's really nice of you, Troy.

And I'd like to say thank you to your readers for bearing with me on this side of the pond.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/gi/304120801

Alright, Troy, happy Thanksgiving. And thanks to everyone who has persisted with this story. I don't know where you are in the world so this is the best I can do:

https://www.flickr.com/photos/alexander_wrege/2998403001

Actually, the Turkish thank you is missing.

Teşekkür ederim.

I forgot you were a linguist, Troy.

It's been great sharing Turkey with you. 

www.etsy.com/shop/euclidstreetshop

Don't forget to sign our guest bench before you go. 

www.etsy.com/shop/SasafrasPrintables

Credits

Matt Stangis is a visual junkie who lives in Grand Rapids, Michigan. He photographed the turkey on a bench with a pumpkin in October 2008. Matt reminded me that Thanksgiving in Canada is different from the States: in Canada Thanksgiving is on the second Monday in October, which this year was October 13th. In the States, Thanksgiving is on the fourth Thursday in November - the 27th this year.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/docksidepress/2982841359

Lori X is a designer. Turistik yuzer tesis isl der and the couple on a bench in Istanbul was photographed by Lori in 2012. My Turkish isn't very good but I could make out the word Tourist. https://www.flickr.com/photos/lorix/7962364616

Jenny is a recent graduate in landscape architecture. She was in Istanbul this year, where she took some gorgeous photographs of the Blue Mosque, the Hagia Sophia, and the benches where you can see the mosque in the background. https://www.flickr.com/photos/8714491@N05/14405449628 For a photo tour of Istanbul it's worth a look at Jenny's photostream.

The two kilim rug benches in the story are by Jay at Jay Bazaar, not in Turkey but in Brooklyn.  www.etsy.com/shop/JayBazaar  Jay's Bazaar is full of lovely kilim rugs, ornaments, and vintage jewelry. 

David Casteel is an elderly curmudgeon from Dallas. He photographed the Grand Bazaar bench on a trip to Istanbul in 2006. He has a whole album full of photos from the trip at  https://www.flickr.com/photos/8712554@N02/873341385

Troy breezed into our town this summer. He's normcore and his occupation is Pilgrim. Apart from that, all we know about him is this: 1) he comes from Dry Heaves, Minnesota, where he learned to read poetry in a particularly alluring voice  2) he never wears shoes  3) he is extremely polite and calls ladies Ma'm  4) he speaks a lot of languages fluently 5) he carries a manbag filled with books, a violin and a ladder in case anyone needs to be rescued.  

Lady Jessica Brassica is a fashionista and former model with Studio Joop from Overbearing in Holland. Now she has her own fashion house at Ballyfrumpy in County Offhand in Ireland. She loves shopping at her replica mall and having poetry read by Young Male Readers dot com. She is happily married to Lord Brassica, Fifth Earl of Drizzly, a gentleman farmer and expert on both cows and picnic benches. Lord Brassica's generosity extends to Thank You benches for the community, as shown here.

But this summer Lord B has been rather busy with his dog Pru, his horse Tonks, and his 1947 Land Rover, so Lady Jess has been spending rather a lot of time at her beach hut with Troy.  The novel Lying Together is by Gaynor Arnold. 

Pinké is a native Texan who makes dog happy art, including Churkey - that's Chuck the dog dressed as a turkey for Thanksgiving 2012. Chuck regrets being addicted to salmon dog treats but apparently there aren't any rehab programs available in Houston.https://www.flickr.com/photos/8113246@N02/8203258965
If you like dogs, there are plenty of great dog benches here on Benchsite.

Pascal lives in Heidelburg and amuses me with his Lego mini-persons. In this story we've got Robert, a Lego person on a bench with a turkey and a sword. The title is Partial Amnesia; that's apparently because Robert only faintly remembered something about Monday, benches, and bonus points for birds. https://www.flickr.com/photos/pasukaru76/5631501667

Christel lives in Trelleborg in Sweden. The bench groaning with pumpkins of all sizes was photographed from the car near Trelleborg in autumn 2006. https://www.flickr.com/photos/78208664@N00/253065157

AGA~mum's photostream has a lot of amazing benches from around the world. She has an eye for a bench, does AGA~mum. I have a heart full of gratitude for her lovely Heart of Gratitude bench, photographed in 2010. It's in a beautiful garden setting and the bench message says it all.   https://www.flickr.com/photos/aga_mum/4706711759

Thanks Mom is from Rakuten in Japan http://www.rakuten.co.jp/  From what I can gather, Rakuten is sort of the Etsy of Japan. Call me fussy, but this particular Mom doesn't look very German; I wonder if Troy is telling porkie pies?


Maik Meid is involved in fundraising, photography, and non-profit social media. He photographed the Danke image in 2014, which is one of many different bricks made for the Spendenstein project.       
https://www.flickr.com/photos/frnetz/14517152083/

Antonio S, aka Ellohir, is an engineering student from Valencia in Spain. The gracias image was photographed in 2007.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/ellohir/2074602394  

Patti Colvin from Oakville, Washington lives on a funny farm. Yes, really. She has a farm full of critters she loves, writes about, and makes things from. Her products are largely organic: the sheep are sheared by her, wool washed by her, and wool spun by her on my drop spindle. Earrings from pop tops, paper mache "Littles", art journals that look like the "Book of Shadows" - Patti loves making something out of nothing. That includes the barn wood sign I am blessed, shown in the story.  www.etsy.com/shop/pattisfunnyfarm


*Lie, pronounced Lee, is from Antwerp. She sent a message - merci with roses and chocolate - to all her Flickerito friends back in 2010. What a nice thing to do. Delightful photo and lots of different languages.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/8458761@N08/5292809230  


Dragon Dream888 seems to keep an eye out for benches. She was walking about a shopping mall in Washington DC in 2009 and photographed the Thank you for not reclining bench. It's one of many in her photostream at  https://www.flickr.com/photos/52807531@N00/4183863804

The Ellen Wachtel commemorative bench is in Central Park in New York City. The photographed was taken in 2010 by Michael Kazarnowicz, who lives in Stockholm.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/encee/5015846088

Troy is a well-travelled pilgrim and a bit of a linguist. He's quite right that in Turkey the country the word for turkey the bird means Indian Bird. The Indian word for turkey means Peruvian bird. And the Greek word for turkey means French bird. However, in Malaysia the word for turkey means Dutch chicken. How does Troy know all this? Probably he looked up 1,411 QI Facts at  www.qi.com/1411  page 216.

Ryan Ward is an attorney from Santa Monica, California. He photographed the peeling orange bench in Istanbul in 2011. Note the crest imprint, which appears on lots of things throughout the city.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/ryanaward/6124826130

William Avery Hudson from New York is a communications consultant and photographer. He photographed the Heybeliada Turkisk poetry bench in 2008. Heybeliada is one of the Prince's Islands in the Sea of Marmara, where there are many poetry benches along the seafront.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/williamaveryhudson/2823734944

Matthias Buehler is a German software developer living in Denmark. He has a nice collection of bench photos and is one of many people who photographed the Istanbul open-book benches. https://www.flickr.com/photos/kakadu/14524464399   

There are many cats in Turkey. Many, many cats. Quite of few of them appear on Flickr pages. I liked this one called Catnap, by Jeremy Brooks in 2014. Jeremy is a software engineer with a passion for photography, especially vintage neon signs. His photos are mainly urban scenes, which is great because this includes lots and lots of benches. Love the closeup of patterns in a metal bench!  https://www.flickr.com/photos/jeremybrooks/15361037117

By the way, if you like cats, let Meredith guide you through the cream of Cat Benches. If you think turkeys are for the birds, there are no spring chickens but a lot of nice hen benches. 

Two things you probably know about Turkey: Turkish coffee and Turkish delight. Both were captured in a beautiful photograph by Colin Warren in 2013. Colin is from Geelong in Austrailia. He's one of those people who gets out there with his camera and photographs all kinds of things - shoes, rocks, plants, dead rabbits - he makes everything look good.    https://www.flickr.com/photos/colinwarren/11865470526

Justin Lehmann, from San Francisco, photographed the benches outside Istanbul's Blue Mosque in 2011. Lots of people photograph these benches as they are very photogenic (the benches, not the people). I think Justin's black and white photograph is very effective.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/soledadbrother/6316314435

There are many ancient ruins in Turkey, including Roman amphitheatres with rows and rows of stone benches for watching gory spectacles. The amphitheatre pictured here is in Side, Turkey, photographed in 2014 by Jacqueline Poggi from Provence. She has amazing photographs of buildings and she loves cathedrals.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/jacqueline_poggi/12907820884

Cindy Oppel is Out Back in the Barn and she sure knows how to celebrate the American holidays. For Thanksgiving alone she's got a handpainted pilgrim boy and girl, a handpainted turkey, and this lovely turkey bench to rest your feathers. Handpainted wood crafts, shop home items, homemade jam - she's got it all for every holiday. We've already had her harvest bench back in the fall and, come St. Patrick's Day in March, I look forward to her Irish bench too. www.etsy.com/shop/outbackinthebarn

Allen is a school district maintenance supervisor and freelance photographer living in Kansas City and Henderson, Nevada. He is an obvious fan of Las Vegas and his photostream is full of roadside Americana - gas stations, cars, motels, neon signs, packaging and suburban life. Oh, this is heavenly nostalgia for me! Allen also collects stuff, like the 1900s postcard of a turkey towing a pumpkin. This was Allen's greeting to his Flickr pals at Thanksgiving 2012. https://www.flickr.com/photos/roadsidepictures/8206417339   

The turkey hotdog is an unusual thing and not something I'd like to eat at Thanksgiving. Well, it certainly caught my eye. It was photographed in 2012 by Jason Brackins, a software developer originally from Bethesda, Maryland. https://www.flickr.com/photos/leff/8208546895

Jench de Bench is a chef from Potirons in France and last year I asked him to help me with my Edible Benches story. Which he duly did, sort of. Well, no, he didn't. He kept disappearing and after a great deal of searching for him throughout France, I gave up and edited the post myself.  I don't mind saying, it's a bit of a mess but still, there are a lot of tasty benches on there.

Jason Taellious from Olympia, Washington likes reflections, long exposures, words, flyer art, architecture and art. His photostream is full of all these things. There's a lot of great stuff and I liked the photo lexicons, especially the word Merci, photographed in Paris in 2013. 
https://www.flickr.com/photos/dreamsjung/12241111044

I love the idea of a cranky messiah. There is one on Flickr and he says he didn't do it. I think he might be from Baltimore but that's really none of my business. The photograph from 2008, Thanks for nothing, is just what I was looking for https://www.flickr.com/photos/24613099@N05/3103515782

Clotho98 from Richmond, Virginia is a no good floozie (her words, not mine). She photographs a lot of vintage advertising and magazine covers, including the the Thanksgiving one from a Boy's Life magazine in November 1927. https://www.flickr.com/photos/clotho98/6389456203

Gisela Giardino lives in Buenos Aires but comes from somewhere far from there. She gets on well with herself and is with herself all the time. She is pretty clear who she is, as shown by the long list on her Flickr profile. Thank you was written in the sand by someone in Nov 2006 and Gisela photographed it before it got washed away.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/gi/304120801

Alexander Wrege says he's alive. Well, that's a good start. Alexander is a teacher from Germany, now living in Toledo in the United States. It looks like he gets out and about all over the place, doing lots of stuff like hiking and kayaking and having fun. Alive, in other words. His photo shows a lot of thank yous in different languages. Very handy for this particular story, though I don't see one in Turkish.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/alexander_wrege/2998403001


Michelle in LA has lots of greeting cards in her Euclid Street Shop. I love the card that says Thanks a B-nch with some lovely balloons where the letter E should be. That would be Thanks a Bench, which is just what I need for this blog. It does occur to me that the balloons are standing in for the letter U, which would be Thanks a Bunch - an entirely different message.  www.etsy.com/shop/euclidstreetshop  

Jessica from SasifrasPrintables in Ohio tells me that a guest bench is an alternative to your run-of-the-mill guestbook- guests sign a blank bench with their name and a message for the bride and groom, and after the wedding the bench is finished and used either in the home or in the new couple's garden/yard. SasifrasPrintables does DIY downloadable and printable holiday and wedding designs such as the Sign our guest bench print. You choose the size of sign you want, download it, and print it out on your own printer. Easy peasy!  www.etsy.com/shop/SasafrasPrintables 


If at the end of this story you have a lust for further travel, you can go lots of places here on Benchsite. See a fiesta of Mexican benches, for example, or an alphabet of Dutch benches. Get high on alpine benches, or tasty Italian ones. Every summer Miggy and Mungo and I go on our bench-finding missions; see our impossible Greek mission, or what happened when we cycled down the Danube. And for some truly amazing Japanese benches, see http://benchsite.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/spring-comes-to-fribble-via-japan.html

Dude, where's my bench?

It's that time of year again and strange things are happening.Here on Paradise Island, some of our best benches have gone missing.

http://www.degercengiz.com

This man has looked everywhere and he can't find his bench.

photo by Matti Mattila @ https://www.flickr.com/photos/mattimattila/8697571441

I wonder if someone might have pedalled off with it?

http://www.bikeforest.com/

Or driven it away?

https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/CandTCustomLures

Some benches are missing in part . . . 

. . . and some have completely disappeared.

http://www.nj.com/

My imaginary husband Mungo is very worried about his precious workbench. Today he moved it to a place of safety.

www.powerhousemuseum.com/collection/

My other husband, His Excellency, tried to move his workbench too but as usual, things went wrong.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/lara604/279938667

Benches are on the move. Today this one is strapped to a tree by the canal, but who's to say it will be here tomorrow?

http://www.rogiermartens.nl/

Benches are more mobile than you'd think. A bench can pop up anywhere. 

http://citysoftwalks.com

Some of them rock.

www.modernconvenience.com

And some of them swing.

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Rocking_bench

Some of them sail away stealthily, like Viking boats.

 www.evanewisinc.com

OK, it's Halloween and you might expect that kind of thing. I don't want to point the finger . . . 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/wheatfields/504907539

. . . but let's face it: there are pranksters about who will move anything.

And at all times of year there are clowns who enjoy stealing benches.

 http://www.flickr.com/photos/roblawol/

This clown looks too depressed to be a thief or a vandal. But you see my point: why are all these benches on the move?

I have come up with several reasons. 

The obvious one is that people are carrying them away.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/pasukaru76/4026588177/

When I say 'people' I mean anybody. Even a gentleman can't resist stealing a handsome bench.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/the_blue/3585943164

When it comes to stolen benches, you're right to be suspicious.

What is this guy up to?

https://www.flickr.com/photos/bearpark/5198646262/

These guys were caught wood-handed.

http://yewtreenights.blogspot.co.uk/

Of course there may be good reason for a bench to be removed.

  Andy Roberts @ distributedresearch.net/blog   

Maintenance. OK, fair enough.

But here in Fribble-under-Par I caught Troy, wearing a tux, taking away a bench on the Esplanade. 

He said he was taking it to the Bench Oscars. Do I look like I was born yesterday?

I'm very good at finding missing benches.

La Cachette, Edouard Mint (1858-1933)

It's interesting how people always have good reasons when you challenge them about moving a bench. These boys said they were carrying a bench to their school.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/unamid-photo/7090446779

And this woman claimed to be moving house by bicycle.

http://lancastercohousing.blogspot.co.uk/2012/12/

Council workers just doing their job?

 http://www.spacehijackers.org

Yeah, right. 

Like you can just pack up a bench and take it away in a rucksack.

http://www.chairblog.eu/2011/11/15/built-to-resist-sofa

At least no one has tried to move these benches while people are sitting on them. 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/peffs/4064006788/

One explanation for all these movable benches is that designers too often give benches wheels.

http://www.coasttocoastaccents.com

This means they can easily be wheeled away.

http://removeandreplace.com

Or perhaps they wheel themselves away of their own accord.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/batintherain/2040245970

This Dutch designer was taking no chances; when making the conversion from a shopping trolley to a bench, he removed the wheels. Maybe supermarkets ought to do the same?

http://etiennereijnders.com

You can understand the need for a bench to break free. Wheel benches are historical, a legacy of the Wild West. 

http://www.flickr.com/photos/chmeredith/

Many a wheel bench was carted across North America in a covered wagon, a sort of Manibench Destiny: Go West, young bench! 

Nowadays wheel benches are found in rural areas . . . 

Patrick Mackie @ Geograph http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Wheel_chair

. . . and they're also popular in houses and gardens.

www.etsy.com/shop/amycphotography

To prevent benches bolting, some have their wheels embedded in concrete. 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/mastahanky/3355172800

Even so, concrete doesn't mean the bench won't disappear.

www.getbracknell.co.uk 

You could send an international scout out looking for them but I'm not sure that would help.

• https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/TailgateGuy

You'd probably get lost yourself and then you'd need SatNav to find your way.

SatNav: where would we be without it?

Some benches are designed to be mobile.They have tyres.Or tires, as they say in some places.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/sassymonkeymedia/2434346085

This bench seems to be collecting tyres so that it can eventually make its escape.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/ellenk/6187313489

And this bench has so many tyres it doesn't look like it's ever going to get rolling. 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/glamhag/1937794256

On the other hand, some benches are fully motorised. This Bench car is ready for a quick getaway.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/alerque/3509494227

This car not so much.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/mister_goleta/2296561300

You could tailgate this bench for quite a long time and it's not going to pick up speed. 

https://www.flickr.com/photos/iluvcocacola/14582730425

There's no dodging the issue: once benches go mobile you can end up with a traffic jam.

https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/TailgateGuy

Well, my favourite garden bench is missing. And I know boot benches are made for walkin' but it's unlikely that it just walked away.

www.etsy.com/shop/PlusZRanch 

I'm still suspicious of these woodland folk.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/44358614@N02/13585640885 

I even wondered if my bench might be disguised as a picnic table under this snowdrift.

photo by Lynne Woodward

I saw these fellows down by the Esplanade and wondered if they had seen my bench.

The Pilgrim's Progress, 1673

I wanted to say Dude, where's my bench? but of course I couldn't. I said

Pray thee Good Sirs, hast thou happened upon my bench? 

They hadn't.   

There's nothing else I can do now. Life's a bench. All I've got left is this:

http://benchsite.blogspot.co.uk/2016/07/a-fine-old-mess-of-british-benches.html

I'm trying to make do with a wheelbarrow but a wheelbarrow is not a bench.

Or is it?

http://www.rogiermartens.nl/

Sometimes I think it is.

Bill Ballance, Bench Appreciation Collective, Facebook

I've put up a poster around town trying to get my bench back.

But in the meantime I'm going to call Dave and ask him to come round and bring my old garden bench back to life. 

That's if I can find him. He's got a mobile van, so like the benches, he could be anywhere.


Credits   

DEĞER CENGIZ has an architecture degree from Mimar Sinan University of Istanbul. He lives and works in New York City where he runs a multi-discipline design firm, producing work in the field of architecture, interior design and product design. The brilliant lawn chaise is fully mobile and alive, in the sense that it's made from wheelbarrow parts, dirt and grass. It was exhibited at the Smithsonian Cooper-Hewitt National Design Museum in 2010.  

http://www.degercengiz.com 


Matti Mattila is an amateur photographer and IT professional whose photostream shows an impressive array of benches. He photographed the man on a bench in Helsinki in May 2013. Matti's title for the photo is First of May Nap but it could also be a man looking for a bench - couldn't it?  https://www.flickr.com/photos/mattimattila/8697571441

The park full of missing benches is Triangle Park in Jersey City, New Jersey. Following a murder in the park in April 2009, all the benches were taken away in a bid to cut crime. This is a move which many cities have adopted. http://www.nj.com/hudson/index.ssf/2009/05/accused_drug_dealer_benches_go.html  For an erudite and slightly peculiar discussion of social and anti-social benches, see http://benchsite.blogspot.co.uk/2014/03/friend-or-foe-social-and-anti-social.html


The photo of the missing picnic tables is one I have had for a long time. The tables were in a park in Bracknell in the UK and were removed to stop bad behaviour. www.getbracknell.co.uk  Lord Brassica, Fifth Earl of Drizzly, is something of an authority on picnic tables and he is gutted to find that picnic tables can disappear like this. On the other hand, Bracknell has the longest picnic table in Britain, celebrated with a mass community picnic in summer 2012. 

Todd in Oshkosh, Wisconsin is The Tailgate Guy. He has built 25 benches from tailgates of various kinds and they're sold on etsy  https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/TailgateGuy  The International Scout, the Dodge and all sorts of others are on his Facebook page, where you can see the whole process from tailgate to bench www.facebook.com/tailgateguy  

The Couch Bike from Bike Forest in Ontario is one of many brilliant bike benches shown in a previous blog. Most bike benches move, but this one moves further than most. Brent Curry and Eivind from rode the Couch Bike through Maritime Canada in 2002. It's a handmade bike with a frame built around an old leatherette love seat. It's steered with a tiller linked to the two front wheels on either side of the couch. Bike Forest aims to promote bicycles and other human powered vehicles as a viable form of transportation. Through renting out a large diversity of well-maintained human-powered vehicles from manufacturers all over the world, Bike Forest hopes to give people a taste of the various options currently available. http://www.bikeforest.com/

C and T in Scottsdale, Arizona make personalized fishing lures, among other things. The red Chevrolet tailgate has been cut and shaped into a rustic bench with a wood slat seat made from reclaimed barn wood.On the left arm of the bench there is a bottle opener made from an old wrench.   https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/CandTCustomLures

The man with the heavy portable workbench is not actually my imaginary husband Mungo. The photograph, made in 1940, is from the wonderful Powerhouse Museum Collection. It was a gift of Clyde Engineering Pty Ltd. in 1988.  www.powerhousemuseum.com/collection/database/?irn=373350

Both my husbands have workbenches but their uses are very different. While Mungo is skilled at woodcraft, His Excellency is not a very practical person so his attempts to do things end in disaster. He blames his school bench for this but I'm not sure. 

The pile of wood shown is a photograph by Lara in 2006. Lara is a casual games artist from Vancouver, who now lives in Seattle. Her albums are full of photos from Canada, the US, Hong Kong, and elsewhere. https://www.flickr.com/photos/lara604/279938667

Dutch bench designers are so exciting that I was able to make a whole alphabet of them. Rogier Martens at Studio Martens in Utrecht has created a number of exciting mobile benches, like the Wheelbench at the end of the story, and The Pop Up bench, which literally pops up out of the pavement. The Tree Bench can be easily strapped onto a tree using a suspension system. It is no challenge to just dig a hole and a install a bench. An ideal bench needs the environment and the environment needs the bench too. To achieve that goal a bench contributes to the park as a walk, sit, rest, kiss, lie, meet, watch, dog walk, day-dream, stretch, run, think, decide, smoke and lunch spot. http://www.rogiermartens.nl/


The Jack Rocker Joggle bench is designed for swaying, friends and fun. It's by Didi Dunphy, LLC and designer at www.modernconvenience.com  Remember the thrill of free time and play in your school days? Didi's designs stem from the concept of Recess and she aims to bring play and free time into home decor: I am interested in the intersection of art and design - fabricating furniture objects that facilitate an interactive cooperative play. She has some other interesting rocking benches - rockers, swings, see-saws. Her Kissing Jim bench has already been on one of Benchsite's more romantic posts.  

If you've ever been in big cities like New York you'll have seen scaffolding all over the place. It's ugly and often in the way when you walk past. But what if this scaffolding is used as a support for pop-up benches to latch onto? Softwalks is an urban innovation studio in New York. Their aim is to make shared spaces more inclusive, livable, and enjoyable. In 2012 Softwalk's green initiative came up with DIY kits so that you can latch your modular bench onto the metal beams to create an instant place to sit in a city space. It's a pilot scheme but it sounds like a great idea. 

http://citysoftwalks.com

The rocking bench chair was seen in hotel Taj Malabar in Cochin, Kerela, India in 2006. It was photographed by Wouter Hagens.
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Rocking_bench.jpg?uselang=en-gb

Evan Lewis is a sculptor who attended the Art Institute of Chicago. Evan and Sandra Lewis opened their furniture showroom on Chicago's North side in 2005. Here they showcase high-end furniture, lighting and objects d'art, such as the beautiful Viking boat bench, which also rocked in the Boat Benches blog.  www.evanewisinc.com

The man on a bench with a pink person pointing at him was photographed in Berlin in 2007 by Christian Guthier, who is a graphic designer. It's one of a Pink Tape Trail from Typo Berlin 2007. There are some fabulous photos of objects and events in this photostream including one that is close to my heart - vegetables. https://www.flickr.com/photos/wheatfields/504907539

The disturbing clown picture is a favourite on Benchsite and introduces the post on miserable benches for Blue Monday.   http://www.flickr.com/photos/roblawol/   Rob snapped the clown on a bench in City Hall Park in New York City in July 2013. I'm one of many people who has added this to their favourites. Rob has lots of candid images from the streets in his photostream, including people sitting, sleeping, and doing all manner of peculiar things on benches. NYC - what a city! 

Pascal, aka, Pasukaru does a lot of work with star wars Lego clones. https://www.flickr.com/photos/pasukaru76/4026588177/ Quite a few of them are doing something interesting on benches. This particular couple are Bench Monday movers but apparently the clones didn't get the bench moved in time for a proper bench monday shot. Pascal says they are very sorry and promise to do better next Monday.

The sculpture man carrying away a bench is from from the outdoors sculpture exhibition of the Swiss Triennial of Sculpture, which took  place in 2009 in Bad Ragaz and in Vaduz in Switzerland. It was photographed by the_blue, whose photostream includes glorious photos from all over the world.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/the_blue/3585943164

Simon James is the guy crouching behind the bench looking strangely suspicious (the guy, not the bench). The photo looking over a wall for Bench Monday in November 2010. Simon lives in Gateshead UK with his lovely wife Claire and his dog Alfie. He mostly works from home (research and consultancy) which means he can listen to  music all day long and also make forays out to photograph benches. https://www.flickr.com/photos/bearpark/5198646262/

The two wood-carved people carrying a bench are raganu kalnas - characters from Lithuanian folklore. They are at Witch Hill in Juodkrante, where a forest trail of sculptures was created in 1979. This photo is from the Yew Tree Nights blogspot, which is written and beautifully illustrated by Jodi LeBigre. Jodi is a painter and printermaker, born in Canada and currently living in Scotland via France and Japan. Her photographs, illustrations and writing make for a fascinating blog.   http://yewtreenights.blogspot.co.uk/search?updated-max=2014-06-16T13:14:00%2B01:00&max-results=7  

The Bench removed for maintenance sign was seen in Wanstead, London by Andy Roberts in 2009 and I saw it at https://www.flickr.com/photos/aroberts/3311629522  Andy works with online communities, research and technology. His blog is at distributedresearch.net/blog   

Troy breezed onto Paradise Island this summer and he's made quite an impact with the ladies, especially Lady Jessica Brassica. The two of them spent most of the summer in her luxury beach hut. Recently he appeared as a model of warm woolly jumpers. He's normcore. Apart from that, all we know about him is this: 1) he comes from Dry Heaves, Minnesota, where he learned to read poetry in aparticularly alluring voice  2) he never wears shoes  3) he is extremely polite and calls ladies Ma'm 4) he speaks fluent Spanish  5) he carries a manbag filled with books, a violin and a ladder in case anyone needs to be rescued.  

The photo of the boys and the benches is by Albert Gonzalez Farran from UNAMID https://www.flickr.com/photos/unamid-photo/7090446779 The boys moving benches were in Sudan in April 2012 when ten new classrooms opened at Abu Shouk camp. Abu Shouk is a camp for Internal Displaced People (IDP), North Darfur. The new classrooms were sponsored by UNAMID, the United Nations - African Union Mission in Darfur (UNAMID). With 26,000 personnel, UNAMID is the largest peacekeeping mission in existence worldwide. 

Debbie from Lancaster is the woman towing a bench with a bike. In December 2012 she actually moved house entirely by bike, an admirable effort to be green. Her blog says it took six days and eleven trips to move three and a half miles from one place to another. Somehow I doubt that house moving by bike is going to catch on.  http://lancastercohousing.blogspot.co.uk/2012/12/moving-house-by-pedal-power.html 

When Camden Council in London removed some of their public benches it was time for the Guerilla Benchers to step in. They turned up at 7 am armed with 18v hammer drills and two benches to be re-installed. Due to their cunning disguises in high visibility vests, the guerilla benchers were not questioned by anyone as they installed the benches. Unfortunately though, the drills ran out of batteries just after the first bench had been installed so in true workman style they retired to a cafe for a fry-up breakfast and cup of tea whilst the batteries re-charged. The missing benches were duly replaced and all was well with the world. The guerilla benchers would like to make it clear that they have NOTHING WHATSOEVER to do with Space Hijackers.org. Have a look at their website and decide for yourself. http://www.spacehijackers.org/html/projects/guerrillabench/guerrilla.html

 
The Built to Resist backpack sofa is an amazing thing. It has loads of pockets and pouches for your stuff, but still manages to foldup as a backpack. It's a 2010 collaboration between backpack makers Eastpak and Belgian designers Quinze and Milan. I saw it on the ever-surprising chairblog.eu 
http://www.chairblog.eu/2011/11/15/built-to-resist-sofa-by-quinze-milan-and-eastpak/  It's one of many brilliant red benches.

The Bench is Tippy warning sign was photographed by Mal Peffs in 2009

https://www.flickr.com/photos/peffs/4064006788/in/set-72157622439314621 Mal is much travelled. Her photostream has a very colourful virgin parade, houses in New York City, Amsterdam's Governor's Island, and more than a few benches from all over the world.  

The pretty rustic cart-style settee bench is from Coast to Coast Imports in Memphis, Tennessee. http://www.coasttocoastaccents.com/c-150-jadu-accents.aspx It's called the Jadu Accents Rustic Cart-Style Settee cart Bench and is made from weathered wood with upholstered cushions & wheels. 

The pallet bench on wheels is one of a wide range range of furniture and other useful things made from pallets. Sheds, gardens, panelling - they can make anything from pallets. I often turn to this site for inspiration. http://removeandreplace.com/2013/06/02/pallet-furniture-repurposed-pallets-ideas/

Etienne Reijnder is another brilliant Dutch designer from my Alphabet of Dutch Benches. His Toosh-e is an ex-shopping trolley converted into a bench. Etienne describes himself as a headstrong designer, who especially loves to walk the road of sidetracks and loves challenges. I believe in simple work. The design and material must fit in with the thought process, so don't make it prettier or uglier than it needs to be. I work very crisp, and pure. His website is at http://etiennereijnders.com

The two benches with wheels behind them create an interesting illusion. The photograph is by Andrea de Poda and was seen in Genoa, Italy in 2007. He lives in Pesaro and does computer stuff. His profile says Life is random. Are you?   https://www.flickr.com/photos/batintherain/2040245970 

2014 is The Year of the Horse so horse benches and all things equine have already been covered here on Benchsite. But of course, as horses are mobile, you'd expect to see some of them again, which is why the horse drawn carriage bench in a countryside background is here again. It's by Christopher Meredith, who lives in Jackson, Mississippi. Among other subjects, his photostream has sets of a Mississippi tea party and a snow storm in Mississippi in 2010. http://www.flickr.com/photos/chmeredith/
 

The single wagon wheel bench is located in Scotland and is dedicated to the memory of the late Dan and Peggy Harvey from Creggan, Southend. It was photographed for Geograph in 2006 by Patrick Mackie.

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Wheel_chair_-_geograph.org.uk_-_184364.jpg

Amy C says photography is her life. She sells matt prints, canvas prints, prints on wood or slate, and prints on gift items such as phone cases, mugs, card, notepads and other items. Amy lives in Virginia and photographs local sites. That means gorgeous autumn landscapes, the Potomac river, Arlington cemetery, and, of course, The White House. But she also travels and photographs what she finds. She saw the wagon wheel bench in Old Town, San Diego.  www.etsy.com/shop/amycphotography

Masta Hanky's photograph is called The Wheels of the Bench Keep on Turnin'. Only they don't, because they are embedded in a concrete bench. Or maybe they do? With mobile benches you never can tell. They were photographed at Liberty Park in Salt Lake City in 2009. https://www.flickr.com/photos/mastahanky/3355172800 

Sassy Monkey at Sassy Monkey Media is a web and print designer, photaag, and freakbike builder. In 2008 he and his mates built the kinetic vehicle which looks kind of like a bench on two tyres. It's the Krank-Boom-Clank "Hennepin Crawler", built for the Krank-Boom-Clank Handcar Regatta https://www.flickr.com/photos/sassymonkeymedia/2434346085

The bench burdened by old tires/tyres is by Ellen, who I think is from Chicago. She calls it, quite rightly, Tyres in Need of Rest   https://www.flickr.com/photos/ellenk/6187313489

The very large bench made up entirely of tyres is at the Rainforest biome at Eden Project in Cornwall. It was photographed in 2007 by Glamhag, who is a member of the wonderful Bench Whores group on Flickr. https://www.flickr.com/photos/glamhag/1937794256

The brilliant Bench dot car was photographed in Salzburg in 2009 by Caleb Maclellan. Caleb's photostream is at  https://www.flickr.com/photos/alerque/3509494227  Caleb is an extremely well travelled freelance programmer who lives in Colorado. His photostream includes glorious photos of the Alps in Germany and Switzerland. Find out what happens when a Swiss policeman pursued Miggy and Mungo through the Alps last summer. 

To prove the point that mobile benches come and go you need look no further than the beautiful vintage red car metro rail bench, which was designed by artist Gilbert "Magú" Luján. It was seen at Hollywood and Vine in 2008 and photographed by Matthew E Cohen. Matthew reports that when he went there again in August 2011, all the car benches had been removed.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/mister_goleta/2296561300

Bill and Vicki T from Rochelle, Illinois were at a flea market in July when they saw this splendid Jeep tailgate bench.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/iluvcocacola/14582730425 Bill and Vicki are grandparents of five and great-grandparents of twins so as you'd expect, their photostream is full of busy family events and getting out and about.

The PlusZ Ranch in Redmond, Oregon is just a little bit western. Inspired by the nature and history of the Wild West, the creative people at the PlusZ Ranch use old stuff like cowboy ropes, worn horseshoes, barnwood, and antique barbed wire to make lovely, rustic things. One of them is the Cowboy boots bench, which reminds me of a gas station we used to go to in Seattle when I was a child. The gas pumps were under the cowboy hat and the cashier lived in the boots. Boy howdy, we loved going there! Sorry, I digress. The PlusZ Ranch shop is at  www.etsy.com/shop/PlusZRanch 

The two woodland folk carrying a heavy log bench away are the same guys referred to earlier. The photo, Long Bench, was photographed by IceM626 on his visit to Lithuania in 2013. Other albums in his photostream include New Orleans, Poland and Utah.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/44358614@N02/13585640885

The picnic table under a snowdrift was photographed by Lynne Woodward, who lives in Kiruna in Sweden. The snowfall in February 2015 was such that all the benches disappeared. 

The pilgrims tried to help me but they genuinely didn't know what happened to my bench. And, behold, as they came up with him, he made them a very low conge is from John Bunyan's The Pilgrim's Progress (1673).

The bench with overgrown ivy is a photo I have had for a long time; it has probably disappeared by now. I don't have a reference for it but if you recognise the bench and/or the ivy, please let me know.

I photographed the pretty wheelbarrow of flowers in Fiskardo, Kefalonia last summer when Miggy and Mungo and I were on our annual bench-finding mission. We didn't have a lot of luck bench-wise but there was a lot of sun, sea and arguments. You can see what we got up to at  
benchsite.blogspot.co.uk/2013/07/greek-bench-mission-impossible.html.

The white wheelbarrow bench is at the National Trust in Wallington, UK. It was photographed by Bill Ballance of the Bench Appreciation Collective on Facebook.

I saw Dave's van recently when I was in Devizes in Wiltshire. A mobile bench restoration service - what a brilliant idea!